Calvyn Desir

A couple of years back when the Old Boys held their annual “bring your neighbour to training” evening, our man Gilly brought along a striker called Calvyn. Upon hearing the word “striker”, the Old Boys management were excited, as they were hoping to find a solution for when Adam Norwood ran out of steam after about an hour twenty minutes. 

Despite Calv turning up in full Manchester United kit, carrying a Manchester United bag and his Manchester United teddy, hopes were high. Calv had all the attributes a good striker needs…six foot tall, well built, tattoos, nice car and a lovely smile. He was signed on the spot. 

Then they saw his finishing and stuck Steve Scott up top instead.